Disclaimer: The author takes absolutely no stake or claim on any characters mentioned.

A/N: Enjoy the KouichixTakuya stuff. Still haven't figured out what to call it. Kouikuya. 'Ichikuya. 2nd Disclaimer: The story should only be viewable on Mediaminer.org and Digiartistsdomain.com. If this story is ever seen elsewhere, please quickly send me an e-mail at Sazreazhyu@aol.com.

Kouji had been in the ground for a week when Takuya lost his job for not going to work. Kouichi knew this because Takuya had called him, just like Kouichi had told him to, blubbering on about how useless he'd become since Kouji's death. As much as Kouichi tried to comfort him and assure him he was only useless when he was stumbling drunk, and then he was only useless in operating machinery, Takuya only sulked and childishly whined. There were times Kouichi had to hold the phone away from his ear at the shrill sounds Takuya made when he was drunk, and times he had to just hang up to save himself from breaking down and crying again. The shock of his brother's death had definitely worn off, and now he was as bad as Takuya; he was crying at every little thing that reminded him of his brother. So when his boyfriend called him sobbing about how he was dead, it immediately ruined his day and sent him off on a crying spell of his own.
The flowers Kouji had sent their mother for Mother's Day were resting on a small table in their living room, where they would always see them whenever they walked by. However, as sad as it was, they were dying. Tomoko refused to throw them out. She would say things like, "Kouji died to send me these flowers," which made it obvious she never intended to get rid of them. Kouichi suggested pressing the flowers, and after a while, she did. They went into a charming little book of poetry Kouji had once gotten her for her birthday. And so the only reminder of Kouji left in the household was pressed firmly into a book, and no more of him remained.
At first, every day was like torture knowing that he'd never see his brother again, but as the days turned into weeks, he eventually learned to stop crying. His mother frequently opened the poems and stared at the flowers, before closing it and pressing it over her heart. They both learned to remember him fondly and to miss him, but not to focus their entire lives around his death and let it consume them with guilt or despair. It was something they'd already learned to do with the death of Kouichi's grandmother, and Tomoko's mother. As unfair as it felt, they figured life would have to work the same without Kouji. Kouichi went to school and work like he always did, and his mother went to work like she always did. They came home and ate dinner like they always did, and then went to bed to get up in the morning to do it all over again. Kouji's absence was painfully obvious in the coming weeks, but they settled into it. Kouichi often wondered about Takuya, who had stopped calling after the first week. Perhaps he was getting himself together too. This didn't bother Kouichi at all, since he'd grown irritated with the clinging brunette's intoxicated calls every day. He had his own life to worry about, and he couldn't be bothered to make sure Takuya's life was perfect.

It was a month after Kouji had been in the accident, during Kouichi's summer break, that Takuya's mother called Kouichi in distress. Since Kouichi assumed Takuya had stopped calling after taking the hint that his calls were stressing his lover's brother out, Kouichi hadn't heard from him for weeks, and hadn't bothered to find out what was going on with the brunette since he stopped using Kouichi as a scratching post for his grief. Instead, as it turned out, Takuya had taken to calling his mother in the middle of the night sounding drunk, tired, and suicidal. Even when zonked out on booze he found a way to call her, speaking in a disturbingly high, emotionless and dead voice as he contemplating killing himself in detail to her, then didn't remember it the next morning. She had repeatedly made trips to his apartment to comfort him and watch over him in the middle of the night, only for him to wake up and wonder why she was there. She was worried sick about him because she couldn't live at his apartment night and day to watch him, or keep getting up in the middle of the night to console him. She was afraid that one night he really would kill himself before she could get to him. Kouichi was silent as he absorbed all this, and on the other end, she was too, as though hoping he would say something.
"Well, it's my summer break," he began, to be interrupted by a sudden "I know," as though this was exactly what she was waiting for.
"I suppose I could just stay over for a few nights and keep an eye on him. Maybe I can help perk him up a bit," Kouichi finished, a little reluctantly, to a swarm of extremely relieved "Thank you's".
The only reason she even thought of him was probably because of his relation to Kouji, not because she knew him personally enough to think he could help him at all. Kouichi sighed. Kouji's brother to the rescue.

He discussed this development with his mother, who thoughtfully bit her bottom lip as he explained the gravity of the situation. She had once loved Takuya like her own son, but had barely thought of him at all since she had told Kouichi to drive him home. Like with Kouji, she suddenly felt guilty again when she realized she might have played a part in this, and Kouichi had to deter from his plans to assure her that what Takuya was doing was absolutely no fault of hers. Neither of them should be held responsible for Takuya just because he couldn't pull himself together. None the less, Tomoko left the kitchen for a few moments, and came back with a pressed rose from her book of poetry. She gave it to Kouichi and told him to give it to Takuya, and to be sure to remind him how much Kouji loved him. He promised he would, and he pressed the flower into another little book to keep it safe. An hour after dinner, he packed a quick bag and set off to console his brother's boyfriend, hoping he could at least keep him from committing suicide while he was there.

Kouichi knocked on the door repeatedly and called Takuya's name to convince him to open the door. After a few minutes of patient knocking and calling he looked for a spare key, but couldn't find one, and he almost considered trying to slide a card through the lock when he simply tried the door. It was unlocked. He eased it open and was blinded by the darkness, which his eyes quickly adjusted to. He shuddered as he stepped into the apartment; the thermostat must've been on 70 degrees. There was no way Takuya could afford to keep the air that cool all the time.
"Takuya-kun?"
No answer at all. It was roughly nine, but it was as dark as midnight in here, and as chilling as though the sun had not passed over for a long time. The dead might have lived here if Hell were exothermic.
Kouichi closed the door behind him and plopped his bag on the ground. He groped around in the darkness until his hands hit a lamp that he could turn on, which immediately blinded him as one single light started a chain of turning on a dozen other lights. His eyes took a lot longer to adjust, and he stood there rubbing them dumbly, until he suddenly noticed that Takuya was sitting on the sofa, less than three feet in front of him, and staring at him with unfocused eyes.
He jumped back in surprise and clutched his pounding heart. He hadn't even heard Takuya cry or whimper, so he'd assumed he must be in his room. He didn't expect to be within three feet of him when he could actually see through the darkness. It took him a moment to compose himself again, and in that moment he looked Takuya up and down. He had dark circles under his eyes and an uncharacteristically dark expression on his face as he only stared vaguely in Kouichi's direction, and his arms were wrapped around his bare knees. He only wore a wrinkled white t-shirt and a faded pair of red boxers, and his hair looked like it hadn't been brushed for weeks. Though he was clearly unshaven, the left side of his face appeared to have thicker hair than the right, as though at one point he'd shaved the right side and for some reason had failed to do the left.
"Takuya-kun?"
No response. His eyes seemed to focus towards him.
"It's me, Kouichi. Remember me?"
His lip trembled, no doubt at the resemblance between the names Kouji and Kouichi. Their eyes locked, and his lip quivered harder.
"Your Kaa-san called me and said you were in rough shape. I was worried about you, so I thought maybe I should come and keep you company for a while."
A dam broke in his eyes and flooded his cheeks.
"So I'm going to stay here for a while, alright?"
Takuya's gaze wouldn't leave his face. His shimmering eyes stared at him, threatening to release more tears.
Kouichi suddenly felt awkward being there. At least when comforting his mother when she cried about Kouji, she was responsive. And sober.
"Are you still drinking?"
He lowered his eyes to the floor, allowing his tears fall silently.
"You're just asking for me to kick your ass, aren't you?"
Not even a weak smile. He managed to force his head up to look at Kouichi's face again for a split second, then his face contorted and he hung his head.
Kouichi stood there for a few seconds, wanting to comfort Takuya, but unable to think of anything that would be helpful. To make himself useful, he instead picked up the can on the table next to him- the aluminum was still cool, but it was empty. A little peeking and he found the couple scattered on the coffee table, and the couple that littered the floor, and a few under the coffee table on the floor. Takuya apparently hadn't cleaned the apartment since he'd heard of the accident. He trashed the cans, and peeked in the fridge. Good, there was only one can of beer left. He opened it and poured it down the sink, and then tossed that can out too. As long as he was here, Takuya wouldn't touch anything alcoholic, though he was probably already wasted enough to last him 'til the morning. Another quick peek in the fridge revealed there was almost no food in it. He'd take him shopping for food tomorrow. Maybe a good meal would pick him up a bit. Kouichi had no doubt he'd been eating nothing but ramen, if at all that, since Kouji's death. And cheap beer. If he'd be here a couple days, the least he could do would be to provide him with some decent cooking.
While he was taking inventory of what was spoiled, a shrill moan brought him back to Takuya. He had hid his face in the couch, mumbling in that high-pitched Takuya-is-drunk voice that almost guaranteed he was smashed enough to last the whole night.
Kouichi was left alone with him for at least a week. He wasn't going to sit by and let him sulk all week, that's for sure. He was a man of optimism. Why hadn't he come to try and cheer him up sooner? Was he that irritated by the brunette to just leave him alone and let him fall into himself?
Takuya looked up at him again, but the second their eyes met, he dug his face back into the couch and made the shrill moaning sound again. Kouichi saw a grown man crying, but heard a child.
"C'mon Takuya-kun, let me sit. We can talk," Kouichi said softly, sensing he needed more attention than what was expired in the fridge.
When Takuya didn't move, Kouichi simply lifted him up himself, and sat on the couch. Takuya's head immediately fell back onto his lap. He rubbed his face pitifully on his knee, his teary eyes leaving wet streaks on his jeans and his prickly beard scratching against the material. Kouichi stroked his head gently, trying to get him calm enough to stop crying. Kouichi once again thanked the gods that he was a docile drunk.
He didn't really want to talk about his brother anymore; he and his mother had done plenty of that. He wondered why Takuya wouldn't talk to his own parents to help himself get through this. Did they not want to talk to him unless he was threatening suicide? Or were they just ignoring him? Did he just not want to get better?
Takuya seemed to be a little bit calmer. He wasn't a human fountain anymore, anyway. His breathing resumed a normal, yet disturbing slow pace.

"Takuya-kun-"
"Stop calling me Takuya-kun," Takuya ground out, sounding only vaguely annoyed. "It's bugging the shit out of me. Kouji called me by my name."
"Well, I'm not Kouji," Kouichi informed him, a little happier that Takuya at least said something to him, even if it involved profanity.
Takuya suddenly started crying even harder than he had before.
"Takuya-kun?" Kouichi pressed. If it got him to talk once, why not again?
He looked up at him for a moment, but as soon as he caught his eyes, his lip trembled again and he fell back onto Kouichi's lap.
"Why...why do I have to keep seeing him..."
"You see him?"
"Y-yeah..."
Kouichi looked around. Pictures had been put away, probably not by Takuya, but most likely by his mother, hoping that not seeing his face at all would help. Kouji was no where to be found in the room.
"Where do you see him?" he pressed, turning him over on his back so Takuya would be looking at him.
"It's too bright," Takuya whined, and put an arm over his eyes. Kouichi sighed and flicked the lamp off again.
The second before the light was turned off he took his arm away from his face and caught sight of Kouichi's face before it disappeared into the darkness. All at once he sobbed even louder and turned away. Kouichi stopped stroking his head as he realized what Takuya had meant by it. He saw Kouji's face in Kouichi's. The second the room was light, he had seen Kouji rise from the dead in the form of Kouichi. Of all the people that could've ever come to comfort him or convince him to start picking himself up, it had to be him, Kouichi, identical twin brother of his deceased boyfriend.
Well, that just made life a lot harder.
"I'm not Kouji, Takuya," Kouichi tried to explain without sounding harsh. "I'm Kouichi. Kouji is dead."
"No..."
"Yes, Takuya, he's dead."
"No, no, no, no..." he moaned, sounding like a pitiful child trying to convince him that if he denied it enough, Kouji wouldn't be dead. Kouichi would have transformed into Kouji as if by magic just by denying he was dead.
After a month, the wound was still this fresh to him? Kouichi suddenly felt guilty he'd been able to get over his brother's death so soon. Had he realized how hurt Takuya was over the loss of someone he loved so deeply...
"Kouji..."
"Kouichi, Takuya. Remember? I'm Kouichi. I'm his brother."
"Kouji," he sobbed, hugging his leg tightly.
Kouichi sat there quietly, letting Takuya cry on his knee and letting him call out his brother's name with in a weak slur of syllables.
"Why..."
"Why what, Takuya?"
Takuya was silent, and then he jerked his head roughly into his knee. "You don't even sound like Kouji," he said accusingly, as though the difference between their voices was something he'd done on purpose when their faces were so similar; he was teasing him and taunting him.
"No, I don't, Takuya-kun," Kouichi agreed to try and coax him to talk.
"Takuya," he muttered darkly.
"I'm sorry, I honestly forgot that time." Takuya took a sobbing breath.
"He... he doesn't want me to forget him."
"Of course he doesn't. He would want you to remember him. Why would you say that?"
"He left you here to torture me."
That stung Kouichi hard.
"So that I'll always be looking at his face..."
"I came here to help, Takuya. I want to help," Kouichi insisted. "We all just want you to be happy again."
"You want to kill me, every time I look at you."
Kouichi sighed. Perhaps there wasn't much he could do with Takuya's mind clouded with alcohol. Maybe he should just let him sleep it off, and they could talk in the morning.
"How about we just put you to bed for the night?"
"I'm not tired," Takuya grumbled, again like a child. He stubbornly hid his face.
"I'll take you shopping in the morning and make you a nice dinner tomorrow; don't you want some good food? I'm a really good cook," Kouichi said soothingly, hoping the brunette's usual interest in food might rekindle.
Takuya hiccupped instead of responding. "I have a headache..."
'I'll bet,' Kouichi nearly said.”Do you want me to get you some aspirin?"
Takuya nodded weakly. Kouichi inched out from under his head and detached Takuya from his leg. Takuya lay there limply as he slowly felt his way back to the kitchen, then began peeking in cabinets until he found a small stash of bottles. He looked through two of them to the best of his ability when reading in the dark; one for stomach aches and one of vitamins, neither of use. The third he picked up revealed to be a non-prescription sleeping aid. At first he wondered what it would be doing in there, then he remember that Kouji had once told him he had trouble sleeping at night. Perhaps Kouji used sleeping pills.
Or had used.
His own eyes started watering up again. Well, he was wondering how long he'd be able to last before he broke down here too. He wiped his tears off on his sleeve, certain that if Takuya saw him crying, he'd be more prone to an outburst himself.
Kouichi only just found the aspirin when he got an idea; if Takuya wasn't tired, maybe a little sleeping pill might help knock him out. He looked over his shoulder into the living room, where Takuya was still laying silently on the couch. God knows, the guy probably needed a good sleep. He paused as he began shaking the bottle to spill the pills into his hands; wasn't there something about not taking them if you're intoxicated?
Positive he'd be suspicious being brought two aspirin and two sleeping pills anyway, and that the worst that could happen with one pill is that he'd have a few cobwebs in his head in the morning; Kouichi brought one of each and a glass of water. He didn't even need to worry about Takuya's suspicion; as soon as he placed the pills in his hand, he swallowed them and drained the water in the glass. He said nothing and made no other movements.

"Takuya, can you stand up?"
Takuya had elapsed back into his untiring silence, and he dropped the glass on the floor. For a split second Kouichi was terrified that maybe the pill had knocked him out already, having had no experience with any kind of sleeping aid, when he realized this was just Takuya's stubbornly unresponsive drunken behavior. He fell back onto the couch, curled into a ball, and made a quiet snoring noise. Good, now maybe he'd get a decent night's sleep. Kouichi managed to pull him up until he was sitting, then was able to get his arms under his back and his legs enough to pick him up bridal style. A month of eating little to nothing had caused him to lose several pounds, and he was perfectly light enough to carry to his bedroom. He deposited him into the bed, where Takuya rolled pathetically into another ball.
Kouichi pulled off his jacket and threw it on Kouji's old computer desk. The computer looked like it hadn't been touched in ages, as had nothing else in the room. Even the lone window looked as though its dusty drapes hadn't been pulled back to allow sunlight in for a long time. It was as though no one even lived here anymore. He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. The depression in the room was stifling. He couldn't imagine how many nights Takuya had laid in this bed, moaning and crying for his lover that he'd never see again. The idea brought tears to his eyes again as he watched the pitiful rolled up ball that was Takuya. He was such a softie; he let his imagination get away with him. As he started to leave the room, Takuya whimpered his brother's name again, then louder, calling after him.
He left the room and closed the door, only to be halted by a fierce cry of "KOUJI!"
Kouichi opened the door again, peeking just his head in. "I'm not Kouji, I'm Kouichi. Kouichi."
Takuya was sitting up on the bed, staring in his general direction, whimpering, "Kouji, Kouji, Kouji."
Kouichi nearly closed the door again, then suddenly remembered he was here to keep Takuya from going off the deep end, namely to make sure he didn't kill himself. If he left him alone while he was visibly upset and crying, what good would he be? Maybe that had been his first mistake a month ago, when he'd heard Takuya whimper in the kitchen.
"Alright, alright, I'm coming back in."
"Kouji..."
"Kouichi."
He closed the door behind him, and he made his way back to the bed. Takuya watched his every move, his lips trembling with every step and his tears flowing fresh every time his eyes rose to meet Kouichi's face.
Kouichi sat gently on the bed, stroking Takuya's head again as he laid back into the bed. He was satisfied that he wasn't alone, even if it was with the wrong person.
Takuya seemed to be nodding off on Kouichi's knee again, and he tried to sneak out from under his head to let him sleep. He got as far as the doorknob when he heard him meekly call, "Kouichi?"
Kouichi sighed. Even if he couldn't be left alone, at least he now knew Takuya was getting good enough to recognize the difference between him and Kouji.
"I'm just turning out the light, Takuya. Don't worry." Takuya watched his every move with teary eyes from the door to the light switch, and then back to the bed. Kouichi pulled the covers over Takuya, and then lay down next to him, above the covers. Even if Takuya insisted that Kouichi be near him even when he slept, he could at least be decent about how he slept with his brother's boyfriend.
Former brother's former boyfriend. He nearly released a sob himself, but refrained, certain it would cause Takuya to start off the same. Then who would be comforting who; not that Kouichi felt like he was doing much good as it were, anyway.

A couple minutes passed, and Kouichi could not sleep. It was still fairly early in the evening, as proven by the sounds of the city beyond the single window, but normally Kouichi would not have trouble sleeping at this time, considering it was around the time he would go to bed so that he could wake up for school and work the next day without feeling sleep deprived. But he was suddenly very stressed out, which he realized was why he'd been avoiding Takuya and had quickly grown irritated with his phone calls. The brunette stressed him out because he wouldn't pull himself out of this rut. Kouichi didn't like pessimistic people, which was probably why he and Kouji couldn't really live together peacefully. They were such opposites. He was too much of a realist, while Kouichi still liked to believe there was some good in the world, to which Kouji would snort at.
Tears welled in his eyes again, even as he smiled at the many sarcastic comments Kouji would have made to the statement that "There was still good in the world." It was funny though; had their roles been switched, and Takuya had been in the accident, he might have imagined Kouji to be the type of person to fall into this depression. Takuya, however...Takuya had always been so bright, and so cheerful. He let things roll off of him with a grin and a shrug. He was the last person he could've ever expected to just drown in alcohol to sooth his pain. Especially considering it had been alcohol that indirectly caused his lover's death.
"Kouji..."
"Kouichi, Takuya."
"I know," he replied miserably. "But Kouji... Kouji didn't like using this blanket, either."
'Obviously for different reasons,' thought Kouichi. Then he realized Takuya was referring to Kouji as a separate person. He rolled over to face Takuya. "Oh?" he said, to encourage him to talk about his brother. Takuya needed a while to get himself to continue.
"Kouji...Kouji said he got too hot using this blanket." Takuya cuddled up in it. "So he used a sheet instead."
"Oh." Kouichi watched Takuya cling to his thicker covers that Kouji apparently did not like, and waited for him to go on.
Takuya was suddenly silent again, and cuddling his blanket with his eyes closed, Kouichi was reminded of a sleeping child. Kouichi figured the sleeping pill might finally be taking effect, so he rolled over again and settled himself.
Kouichi floated off into a semi-dream state. He still felt like he was awake, but at the same time he knew he was asleep, which is why it was strange. Since he knew he was asleep, and he was consciously aware of it, it what made him wonder if he really was asleep. He could picture himself in the bed very clearly. He felt something rubbing against his back, and he ignored it, still trying to figure out whether he was asleep or not, when a whimper solved the problem once and for all as it woke him. He blinked to try and caress the sleep out of his eyes, and squinted to look at the clock. It was nearly midnight; he'd only been asleep for an hour or two.
"Kouji couldn't sleep very long," he heard Takuya whisper from behind him. He suddenly realized he was latched onto him from behind, hugging him tightly. "He'd wake up in the middle of the night sometimes, three or four times."
Takuya didn't say anything else, and Kouichi assumed he was finished. Figuring there was no harm in letting the brunette continue hugging him if it gave him comfort, he settled back into his spot and prepared to go to sleep again.
"Kouichi..."
He scowled. His patience was running thin. But, at least he wasn't still calling him Kouji. "Yes, Takuya?"
He realized Takuya was digging his face into his hair. "Kouji would never let his hair down. He thought it made him look like a girl."
Kouichi was uncomfortable being compared to his dead brother, especially by his brother's surviving lover. "I'm not Kouji. I like my hair down and at this length."
"Kouji looked like a girl when his hair was down," Takuya informed him, slurring his words a little. "But you don't. That's why it doesn't bother you. Kouji looked like a girl..."
Kouichi realized that Takuya was starting to repeat himself.
"He would kick my ass for saying that..."
Kouichi smiled. He and his mother found it better to jest fondly in memory of Kouji rather than somberly just talk about him. The more Takuya got used to this way of thinking, the better.
"Kouji looked like a girl-"
"So you've said, Takuya."
"But only when his hair was down. He looked like a prince."
"And I suppose he was a princess with his hair down?" Poor Kouji was probably turning in his grave.
Takuya shook his head. "You're like a prince with your hair down." He apparently misunderstood the question, but he didn't seem to notice as he fell back into silence for several minutes. Kouichi's eyelids were getting heavy again-
"Kouichi?"
Kouichi sighed and rolled over to face Takuya, tired of talking over his shoulder and hurting his neck. He shied away, and wouldn't say anything else.
Well, if Takuya wanted to talk to him while being ignored, that was fine with him. He'd pretend to listen as he drifted off again. He rolled over again, and Takuya hugged him from behind again.

"Kouji always woke up in the middle of the night. Four or five times a night," he mumbled.
"So you've said," Kouichi gently reminded him. "Except before you said it was three or four times."
"Five, three, four," Takuya muttered, and somehow Kouichi found the number order amusing. "Then he'd wake me up in the middle of the night, too."
Kouichi raised a brow, "Why would he do that?"
"So he could fuck me."
Half-asleep, Kouichi stared dumbly into the darkness, trying to wrap his mind around the words. "...Eh?"
"Kouji was really, really horny when he woke up in the middle of the night. So he'd wake me up. He'd start kissing me and making it impossible for me to breathe, and then when I woke up, he'd start touching me roughly to make sure he had my attention. Sometimes if I refused to wake up, he'd just shove his cock in my mouth until I choked myself awake, and he would smile when I realized what he wanted, and took his dick in my mouth to save myself from being fucked that time. It almost never worked. Even if I got him off he'd still want to screw me. I never went to bed with clothes on because Kouji would probably just be ripping them off sometime in the night."
'Waaay too much information,' Kouichi thought as his cheeks burned red. He wasn't interested in hearing about their sex life.
"Then again, that probably made him want to fuck me more. You're lying in bed with someone who's falling asleep right next to you, is buck-naked, and you know will do whatever you want if you nudge them enough. I couldn't win, could I?" Kouichi was about to object to this topic going on any further when he felt Takuya squirming from behind him, either uncomfortable sharing this bit of information with Kouichi, or noting that he was in bed with a Kouji look-alike and he was wearing clothes, which according to him, he does not do. Takuya rubbed hard again him again. "Takuya," he had to pause to try and think of a question that would get him off topic, but his mind was blank. Takuya continued before he could sidetrack him, and he somehow found himself completely unable to interrupt.
"I guess that's why Kouji never slept with my blanket. He got really hot, and when he got really hot, he'd want to pound me. He'd pound me like a dog. It felt so good," Takuya breathed, and rubbed against Kouichi again, and the latter suddenly realized why. He felt something firm and hard poking into his back, and as he scooted away, Takuya followed him, pressing hard against him. Kouichi was suddenly very warm. "That's why he liked to keep it so cool in the apartment; if he got too hot, he'd get horny, and he'd wear me out. But also because he knew the cooler it was, the more aroused I'd be, and the more willing I'd be when he got in the mood. We were opposite. Heat gets him really turned on, and I can't stand cold; even a little coolness at least gets my nipples hard, and sometimes out of the blue I'd just wake up, dangerously hard. Kouji was good at conveniently noticing. Sometimes he'd turn it down to 65 in here, and he'd hide my blanket, knowing in the middle of the night I'd be freezing and close to exploding with a boner. He was amused when I'd wake him up and would beg him to take me instead of the other way around."
Another poke at his back with something hard and firm. Kouichi tried to scoot away again, but Takuya held him strongly in place. He had kicked the blanket off. His legs were wrapped around Kouichi's.
"I was so tired when he woke me up, but if I refused to wake up and let him take me, and if I refused to let his cock in my mouth, he'd just start blowing me over and over again to punish me. I'd lay here moaning and cumming again and again, and he wouldn't stop until I let him have his way. He knew how to turn me on, no matter what. Sometimes, if I was really unresponsive, he'd put ice in his mouth when he blew me. That really threw me for a loop. His mouth was so cold..." He shuddered against Kouichi and started rubbing against him harder.
Kouichi now felt extremely uncomfortable, and he finally started to move out of the bed. He shifted his legs off of it, but Takuya followed him, clutched onto his back and dragging himself along with his movements, panting all the while. "Then, even when I was exhausted, he'd just start fucking me, no matter how many times I'd come that night, no matter how many times I told him I was tired. And every time, I forgot why I was protesting, because he felt so good. He wasn't really long, but Gods, he was thick. He didn't even have to aim for my prostate; he slammed right into it the second he entered me. I came twice for every one of his orgasms, and Kouji sometimes wanted to come as often as five times a night, every night. He was so hungry. I had to change the sheets almost every morning because they were soaked with cum and sweat after almost every night. Then we'd take a shower, and he'd pin me against the wall..."
Kouichi jumped out of the bed, pulling Takuya along with him who almost dragged him to the ground with his deadweight because he refused to let go of Kouichi. "The cool wall, fucked me into the wall, cold water raining down on me, tile rubbing against my nipples, staring at his reflection in the tile..." He was panting loudly and irregular now, and he gave a little cry as he rubbed even harder against his lover's gaping brother, dry humping his thigh. "Kouichi..."
"I am not Kouji, Takuya," Kouichi finally squeaked out, not correcting him but reminding him that he was not his brother.
"I know." Takuya stood up on his own, and forced Kouichi to turn around to look at him. His eyes were glazed and coupled with his insistent panting and his small, pink tongue flickering and drooping over his rosy lips, he looked like a dog in heat. That flickering little tongue teased Kouichi's lips and tasted his rapid breath. "But you look just like him."
Kouichi pushed Takuya away from him and ran out of the room, leaving Takuya to sob and whimper on the floor. He slammed the door behind him.

Kouichi was sitting at the kitchen table and was drinking the strongest, blackest cup of coffee he'd ever had before. This was not necessarily by choice; there was no creamer and almost no sugar to be found anywhere in the kitchen. It had clearly been more than a month since shopping had been done.
Kouichi should've known Takuya had ulterior reasons for keeping him in his bed; it had just taken him a while to work up to it. He was sex depraved after a month without his lover who, by the sounds of it, never let them go a day without wild sex taking place. He was probably starving for some kind of contact, even if it had to be with his boyfriend's own brother.
He sipped at the coffee, and made a face at the taste. He'd definitely be picking up French vanilla creamer when he got to shopping tomorrow. Then he laughed shortly at himself for being able to think such a normal thought amidst all this.

He'd been debating with himself for half an hour whether or not to just take his things and leave, right now, without telling Takuya. His mother would ask questions, but she would trust his judgment. He could just tell her that Takuya was just fine. Yep, completely peachy. Sat there all perky and happy and they talked about Kouji and he'd never drink again and everything was dandy. Except, he couldn't do that. And what about Takuya's mother? He'd promised her that he'd look after Takuya for at least a few days. He was never a man to break his promises, ever.
His forehead fell so low it touched the rim of his cup. Damnit, he had to be so proud.
And then, it wasn't even that. His conscience wouldn't allow him to leave Takuya all alone in this house, knowing damn well he wasn't emotionally (or possibly mentally) stable and knowing damn well (from personal experience) that he was prone to unpredictable behavior.
Takuya would be sulking in his room because Kouichi had left him. Twice in the past half hour he'd almost gone up too see if he was okay, but he was more afraid that Takuya would misinterpret the visit and he would start trying to seduce him again than finding him dead. He'd heard a few low moans come from the bedroom that made his hair stand on end. He blushed as he imagined what Takuya might be doing in there, and then quickly sloshed his coffee into his mouth to take a burning sip so that he could erase the image.
He was probably so desperate and sex deprived he'd be willing to do anything to pull Kouichi back into bed with him, though it probably wasn't entirely his fault. He was lonely, he was grieving, and he wanted his lover back. And he was drunk. And apparently that sleeping pill didn't do enough to knock him out; but maybe, considering he was wasted when he gave it to him, instead of making him sleep it made him act a little crazy. Kouichi had no idea; he'd never had anything to do with sleeping pills, prescription or otherwise. Or, hey, maybe the pill HAD knocked him out, and he was sleep walking! Or... not. He'd never heard of anyone being horny and trying to molest anyone while sleep walking. Then again, most people didn't take sleeping pills with alcohol. So. Yeah. Maybe that...did...something or something. Also then again - yeah, he needed to stop thinking. He rubbed his forehead, took another sip of his coffee, and sighed. Takuya would wake up in the morning, and just like with his suicide calls to his mother, he'd forget the whole thing. They'd go shopping and he'd help clean up the apartment. Maybe they'd go out to dinner instead and it would help him perk up a little to be back around people. Takuya just needed to be around someone. He wasn't meant to be lonely; he was meant to be the center of attention, like he'd always been. Kouichi realized he didn't even know Takuya's favourite place to eat, or even his favourite food. He just knew in general the brunette liked eating. Didn't he know anything about someone he once thought he was so close to?
Kouichi had gotten up a while ago and had tweaked the thermostat. It was 78 now. The chill had yet to leave Kouichi's spine.

To keep his mind busy, he decided he'd start making a list of what he would shop for in the morning. There was no sense in waking up in the morning and trying to do it when he'd probably be more occupied with awake-and-not-drunk-or-horny-Takuya. He opened a few drawers looking for a pen and a pad, when instead he found an entire drawer devoted to various kitchen instruments, including a pile of long, sharp knives.
He stared at them, his mind drifted back to Takuya again. These knives were so... accessible. He could get them at anytime. Shouldn't he hide them? And what about everything else in the house? How many things could Takuya kill himself with? He nearly wanted to throw the knives away like he had with the can of beer, but caught himself. It would be ridiculous to throw out an entire drawer of silverware because of a momentary fear of what Takuya could do with them. He decided he'd be writing his list in the kitchen - keeping guard over it, just in case - when his mind wandered back to Takuya all alone in the bedroom. Was there a razor in the bathroom? Takuya had certainly gone a while without a shave, but that didn't rule out the possibility. Surely the knives in the kitchen couldn't be the only object in the house you could kill yourself with, so maybe his guarding the drawer didn't make a difference. The bathroom was connected to the bedroom. Twenty seconds at most to get from the bed to the bathroom to a razor-
Another low moan in the bedroom. Was Takuya... relieving himself of his situation, or was he trying to kill himself? Was he just drunk and moaning that he'd lost his lover twice, in his intoxicated eyes, and was just sulking? Kouichi was really starting to hate his imagination, which in the end he decided was the culprit for his paranoia.
Kouichi rummaged through a few more drawers to find his pen and paper. It took him a long time to start focusing on his list, but when he did, he relaxed a little. Organization calmed him down, and so did puzzling to himself what he would shop for without quite knowing what the brunette liked to eat. At least, it did until he heard a loud THUMP against the door to the bedroom.
He was just about to jump up and run in to check on Takuya when he heard a door opening. Kouichi was suddenly stone still and he listened as Takuya slowly made his way to the kitchen, probably leaning on the walls for support so that he wouldn't fall into anything again. He momentarily paused, and then Kouichi heard him coming again. Was he still looking for sex, or had he calmed down? Was he just looking for someone to blubber on about his brother to? Takuya reached a hand into the kitchen, felt around the wall, and flicked off the light. All the lights that were on suddenly went off, leaving Kouichi blind in the darkness. He heard Takuya approaching him.

"Kouji..."
"Kouichi, Takuya," he corrected automatically.
Takuya groaned, and Kouichi heard him panting again. He was only a few feet away now. Kouichi heard him stumble. "Kouichi..."
Kouichi backed up in his chair, clutching the sides as Takuya paused right in front of him and leaned down, breathing on his neck. "Takuya, do you still have a headache? Maybe you should take some more aspirin." Kouichi had taken out the sleeping pills because he had planned to use them to get to sleep after drinking his coffee. He reached for them now, prepared to shove them down Takuya's throat if necessary.
"I don't have a headache, Kouichi-chan..." Takuya nuzzled his neck. The prickly hairs tickled him. "I just have a hard-on..."
Violent blush again. He took that to mean Takuya wasn't over his sex craze yet.
"Why did you make it so warm in here, Kouichi-chan? Do you like the heat, too? Does it get you horny when you're hot?" Takuya started to straddle his legs. "I can get you really hot, Kouichi, if you want."
Kouichi used his feet to push his chair away from Takuya, who lost his balance and fell onto his lap. He climbed up, wrapping his arms around his neck. Kouichi's body stiffened at how warm Takuya was; he probably was naked. The image of his dead brother's lover straddling him naked didn't do wonders for his sanity. He dropped the sleeping pills on the floor and let them roll away into the darkness.
"Takuya, listen to me. I'm not Kouji."
"I know, silly." Takuya's little pink tongue was tasting his silky neck. "You don't even sound alike." Kouichi detected a shred of mockery in the statement. Sleep walkers can't be conscious enough to be sarcastic.
"I'm Kouichi, I'm his brother. Your dead lover's brother, are you listening? You don't really want sex with ME, you want sex with HIM. And you're going to regret this in the morning."
"I need you so bad right now. Kouichi-chan, I'll do anything for you. Anything you want." He completely ignored him. There was a note of desperation in this voice now, not a coy little seduction, as though he was suddenly afraid Kouichi might NOT want sex with him. "I haven't come since the morning Kouji...Kouji..." he weakly sobbed and rubbed against Kouichi. "I'll do anything you want. No matter what you want me to do. Kouji had a lot of kinks, and he collected a lot of stuff. Do you like whips, Kouichi? Do you want me to call you Master? I'll get on my knees and call you Master, if you want. Get down and my knees and bark like a dog, if you want me to. I'll howl and beg and let you pound me like a dog. I'll let you do anything you want to me."
"Takuya you aren't listening to me! I don't want to do anything-"
"We have dildos, too," Takuya interrupted quickly, trying to nail something Kouichi might be interested in, though he only succeeded in making the raven-haired flush. "Lots of interesting toys. Kouji liked interesting toys. Vibrators, dildos, anal beads, anything, I don't care. Please, just fuck me. Fuck me good and hard."

Kouichi reached up to push Takuya off of him again, when he suddenly realized why Takuya had turned off the lights. He felt silky smooth material and lace under his fingers, and now that his eyes were adjusted to the dark, he found that Takuya was wearing pure white lacy panties and bra, and that the panties were being stretched unnaturally by a large bulge right smack in the middle of his groin. He dumbly stared at it as his cheeks flared up with heat, and Takuya followed his gaze, blushing like a schoolgirl.
"Kouji liked dressing me up in girly panties sometimes before he fucked me...I thought maybe you'd like it too." He squirmed and made his erection even more noticeable.
Kouichi looked back at Takuya's face, suddenly suspecting the schoolgirl blush was partly a ruse to seduce him again. His pouty lips quivered and he suspected it wasn't from embarrassment, but from the need for someone to ravish him and kiss him.
He was dumbstruck, and he couldn't move. He wanted to push Takuya off of him again and run somewhere else, but where else would he go? He couldn't leave the apartment or he'd be breaking his promise to take care of Takuya, and no matter where else he went, Takuya would follow. And if he kept pushing him away and leaving him, or worse yet, yelled at him to stop trying to seduce him, who knows what he'd do? What if Takuya committed suicide right in this kitchen while he, Kouichi, was running away from a sad, lonely man he thought he'd once loved like a brother? In a bloody flash, he imagined Takuya grasping one of those huge, shiny knives from the drawer, and plunging it into his throat. A waterfall of blood would flow over his hands and he'd collapse to the ground in his own pool of blood, crying while Kouichi ran away from him for wanting to be loved.
Kouichi was screwed, no doubt about it.

"Master..." Takuya sighed, rubbing against Kouichi harder and unaware of the gory thoughts running through Kouichi's overactive mind. Takuya's swollen red head peeked obscenely out from the panties, and Kouichi couldn't help but stare and blush. A timid little part of his mind wondered why he was protesting so much against Takuya's advances on him. If he wanted him so bad, what was wrong with giving him what he wanted? Maybe it would settle him down a little; make him a little happier. It wouldn't mean anything; it would just be a way of calming him down. Takuya made a particularly violently thrust against him, and Kouichi suddenly remembered his argument: Takuya would probably hate himself in the morning if he found out he'd been disloyal to his real lover while under the effects of booze, which would probably make him want to drink more.
That, and Kouichi had never had, or had even contemplated sex with another man before. The thought of himself doing what Takuya had described Kouji doing to him was repulsing because it had sounded like rape, yet Takuya seemed enthralled by it. Asking for normal sex seemed like a huge request now, but what if he gave in and later Takuya started pressuring him to do other things? To use the toys on him? Or worse, to physically hurt him? Was he a masochist? Or was he just that used to submitting to whatever insane things Kouji pushed him to do?
Takuya moaned as he rubbed harder against Kouichi's trembling leg; whimpering Master, Master, Master instead of Kouji, Kouji, Kouji. Takuya leaned back and Kouichi held him to keep him from falling as he rubbed harder and harder on Kouichi's leg, as though his life depended on the friction and he apparently paid no mind that he was the one doing the work. Kouichi watched the brunet make shallow gasps as he used his feet and Kouichi's shoulders as leverage to roughly pound into him, and Kouichi's stomach fluttered every time that firm bulge rubbed into him. Takuya suddenly shuddered and moaned as he came, partially releasing on Kouichi's shirt, on his own stomach, and in the virginal white panties. He fell forward and rested his head on Kouichi's shoulder, where a month earlier, he'd been using it as a headrest at Kouji's funeral.
"Ooh, Master," he whimpered, as though in shame. "You made me come in my panties...I feel so dirty now."
Takuya's shrill Takuya-is-drunk voice made him sound perfectly appropriate, and not at all as though he were trying to seduce Kouichi into having sex with him, but actually chastising him for making an innocent virgin come; though he'd done nothing to cause it. He almost did sound like a pitiful, innocent little virgin who felt dirty at his first orgasm, though he was far from ashamed and this was far beyond his first orgasm. What sort of sick, freaky things had Kouji insisted on doing during sex? Takuya noticeably relaxed and realizing this, so did Kouichi. He hadn't noticed he hadn't been breathing until he took a gasping breath.

"Takuya?" Kouichi was appalled to hear his voice was cracking and shaky.
"Kouichi..." the brunet muttered in response, and he thought that he might have finally gotten over it when: "Please fuck me..."
Too decent to just push him off now that he was calm but unwilling to sit there and practically invite Takuya to continue using him as a source of relief, he picked him up as before, though he was disturbed again to find that his arms were trembling and his legs were weak as he brought him back to the bed. Kouichi paused in the short hall as another shiver slipped down his spine, and he noticed the thermostat was back down to 70; it was already 75. Takuya was purposely making it cold in the house so that he would get turned on. Did that mean he was expecting Kouichi when he first arrived? Had he planned this all along?
Kouichi shuddered, and not from the cold. He tried to maneuver his arms to hold Takuya and raise the temperature, but he couldn't find a way to balance the brunet without dropping him. He left it as is, figuring he could just come right back out after putting Takuya down. He eased through the door and plopped the brunet on the bed. Takuya laid where he was dropped, breathing deeply and ignoring Kouichi completely. Good. Hopefully now with alcohol, a sleeping pill, and a recent orgasm under his belt, he'd be more compliant to sleep. Kouichi pinched the end of his shirt where Takuya's cum gleamed. Disturbed, he wondered where to find his bag so that he could change. It seemed like forever since he'd walked through the door to this sex-crazed Narnia- ah yes, the door. His bag would be somewhere near there.
Takuya laid there, dead to the world, and Kouichi stood before him, arguing with himself for a full five minutes before he slowly pulled the cum and pre-cum soaked panties off of him, and tossed them in a laundry hamper that hadn't been emptied in a month. Certainly, no one wants to sleep rolling around in his own semen. He ignored Takuya's soft cock the best he could while doing so, blushing whenever his curious eyes pulled up to peek before he could control them back down again. He swallowed hard. Well, at least Takuya was zonked out for now, he hoped. He tiptoed to the door to finish his list and his coffee after a quick change. He had almost just closed the door-

"Kouichi-chan." Takuya's voice was thick and uncertain, as though he'd forgotten how to make the words. Kouichi bit his lip and considered just leaving. He was already past the door, already going to leave him; why would Takuya care if he left? If he was that horny, he could screw a pillow for all he cared. He wasn't interested in being an object of frottage again.
"Kouichi-chan!" Takuya whined in his shrill voice, and Kouichi couldn't bring himself to leave him alone as his mind slipped back to the kitchen knives and the pool of blood.
"Kouichi-chan..." he sobbed, and Kouichi peeked through the door again.
"Yes?"
"Please sleep with me. You don't have to fuck me, but sleep with me. I don't know what I'd do to myself if you left me alone again..."
That was as close to a suicidal threat as Kouichi was willing to get. Reluctantly, he eased open the door and inched into bed with him again, wishing he had his bad tasting coffee with him and his grocery list to keep him occupied. At least this way, he figured, Takuya couldn't get to anything dangerous without waking him, and he took some comfort in that.
"Kouichi-chan..." Takuya clung to him and started nuzzling him again, lifting a leg over his.
"Hey," he warned, slipping his hand between his arms and holding a finger in front of his face. "You said no sex."
"I said you don't have to do it, but I never said I wouldn't try to get you to do it," he retorted slyly.
Damn. He forgot Takuya had lived with his brother.
"You're such a dirty boy, Kouichi-chan, taking off my panties so slowly and teasingly and turning me on, then just leaving me with a pounding hard-on. Were you going to spy on me and see if I jerked off?"
Kouichi blushed violently. He was delusional. There was no other explanation.

Takuya took his hand and led him to touch his cock. Kouichi's face went beet red as his fingers clasped around the hard organ. It almost felt like it had its own heartbeat. "Do you feel what you do to me?" the brunet said huskily in Kouichi's ear. His hand unconsciously felt what he'd done to Takuya. His fingers couldn't stop feeling. Takuya's eyelids fluttered and he clung closer to Kouichi, breathing warmly on his neck until he reached up to meet his lips. They were already parted in an 'o' of shock, and Takuya dipped his tongue inside. He traced Kouichi's teeth and teased his tongue, trying to get it to play with him, but then quickly grew bored when it wouldn't.
Takuya rolled Kouichi on his back and settled himself on top of him. His cock was suddenly at attention, jutting out from his groin and keeping Kouichi's attention as Takuya removed the bra, sensing Kouichi had no interest in it. His heart was pounding. He never imagined himself ever having sex with a man, let alone his brother's own boyfriend. Yet, here he was with a naked and horny Takuya straddling him, and somehow he was curiously eager. Takuya reached a hand up to his own pert nipples and pinched them with a weak moan and a jerk, which, taken into perspective, somehow seemed extremely erotic to Kouichi. For the first time all night, he suddenly felt warmth spread through his body and stiffening in his own shaft, which both disturbed him and somehow got his heart galloping. Takuya rubbed a slender finger under his chin as he grasped his hard-on, muttering something about a perverted little boy who wanted to see him masturbating. He was drunk and he was mad with grief, but he was still human, with desires and needs, no different than a woman except in certain genitalia factors. He was ripe and desperate after a month of no sex, and he was ready for the taking. Why shouldn't he? His brother, rest his soul, was dead. This needy, desperate lover was not.
"What do you like, Kouichi-chan?" Takuya purred, letting his body fall over his and suddenly making him hotter. "I'll do anything you want me to do. I'm very flexible in bed when it comes to playing with something new. No matter what little kinks you have, I'll do it, no questions asked."
"I-I don't really have any weird fetishes or anything," Kouichi found himself answering, seriously considering allowing himself to slip into his hands. This seemed to irritate Takuya.
"Then what do you want me to do?"
Kouichi lightly blushed again. "Whatever you want to do," he answered truthfully, giving him full reign of whatever he wanted. It was only one night; what harm could it do?
Takuya paused, and then leaned his face down into Kouichi, breathing hard and nipping at his neck. "I just want to be fucked."
Coming from a fading drunk whose voice still had a childish pitch to it, the desire sounded even more obscene than just how it was worded. Takuya crawled up close and sat on his chest, holding Kouichi's face upwards so that he'd be looking up at him, not at what was below him. Kouichi could still smell the strong, musky scent that was so close, and that timid little piece of his mind started knocking around again when his eyes met with Takuya's expressionless ones.
"Can you fuck me good, Kouichi?"
Kouichi was embarrassed by the profanity, and what it indicated. At the moment he couldn't properly imagine himself having sex with Takuya, but his mind was trying to. He found himself liking the imagery he came up with, and it wasn't helping that the incense of his musky scent kept weaving itself into his nose.
"I've never actually done it before." 'With a man', Kouichi was going to add, because he had actually been with a woman before, thank-you very much. He had no real idea how to have sex with a man, but he wasn't sure how Takuya would take to that.
It seemed to interest him, and Kouichi could swear he saw his cock suddenly twitch. Peering through the darkness, he could see it was leaking pearly white juices only inches away from his face. Seeing the hard, desperate organ crying for pleasure and relief suddenly unlocked a piece of his mind that demanded it be obeyed. He sensed the stirring of an animalistic urge poking where the once timid section was. Takuya lifted himself off of Kouichi, and he fought the spontaneous desire to pull him back down and ravish him while at the same time wondering what he was supposed to do if he was the "top" in this one-night stand. His only experience with a woman didn't matter, for sure, and he hadn't exactly grilled Kouji on precisely how he and Takuya did it. It was never any of his business; his brother was gay and Takuya was his boyfriend and that was always that.
Damnit...why did Kouji keep having to surface at times like this? Kouji was dead. Let him stay dead.

Takuya suddenly roughly unzipped his jeans and pulled them off of his legs impatiently, and quickly stripped him of his boxers afterwards, which provided plenty to Kouichi's blush. Takuya hummed as he grasped Kouichi's growing length, squeezing it lightly and causing Kouichi to inhale sharply. "I hope you like this, Kouichi-chan," Takuya purred as his little pink tongue flickered over the plump, pink head. "I've been craving this for a month." He roughly jerked his hand to indicate what he'd been craving. All the blood from Kouichi's face rushed downward, as did his gaze.
"Mhmm, that's funny."
Kouichi's body was torn between letting blood rush to his cock or to his face. "What?"
"Not as thick as Kouji, but longer. The twins of irony is amusing." Kouichi didn't know whether to be embarrassed or complimented or to correct Takuya, who probably meant to say: "The irony of twins is amusing."
A few drawn-out licks to make sure he was hard was all Takuya had the patience for, though Kouichi shuddered at each drag of his tongue and wished he'd make it last. He allowed his saliva to drip down the hard shaft, and let it suffice. He ripped off Kouichi's shirt and let it fall off the bed, then thought to roll off of his compliant new lover to search for something under the bed, leaving Kouichi naked and defenseless. Takuya shook with anticipation and more than once, Kouichi saw him give his sobbing erection a hard squeeze, and then stop suddenly as though against pleasuring himself. Having picked up a bare minimum of basic knowledge from Kouji, Kouichi was expecting Takuya to reappear with some sort of lubrication. Instead, he crawled back over Kouichi, stretching a black, rubber-band like ring over his cock and bringing it down to the hilt, before letting it go with a snap and causing Kouichi to jerk at the pain. His cock suddenly began to throb twice as hard, leaving him to wonder if it was cutting off his circulation. He gave Takuya a curious look, but he just smirked and suckled his fingers.
"Cock ring."
Kouichi wondered what that meant. He felt completely uneducated, and figured it best to just let keep his promise to let Takuya lead the way.
Takuya kneeled over his firm rod and spread his ass far apart to gently finger the tight, rosy hole he found there. Kouichi realized what he intended to do a second before he did it, and as he grabbed the brunet's thighs, Takuya dropped down straight onto him. They moaned simultaneously, Takuya more so than Kouichi, having had very little preparation to ease the forced entry into a region of his body that had not been violated for a month. He was making deep, guttural pleasured noises and his face was deep red, and not from the booze. He jerked hard at his crying erection to distract himself from the pain, and Kouichi gasped at the sight of the clear pre-cum beginning to drip down his knuckles. He stared wide-eyed as Takuya squirmed on top of him, clutching his shoulder with one hand as he tried to adjust to the penetration.
"It just... usually doesn't go so deep," Takuya muttered to no one, and he sighed as he slowly moved over Kouichi to situate himself. He rose gently, leaning down into Kouichi's shoulder as he let his cock slip out, took a few shuddering breaths, and then stretched himself open to take it in again. It entered slightly smoother, but Kouichi still ground his teeth at the feeling of stretching that incredibly tight hole. He wanted to say something, but only released a breathless "Ahh" as Takuya lifted and slid back down, then began repeating the movement, holding his own body erect and steadying himself on Kouichi's chest.

Kouichi raised his knees and clutched at the sheets, doing little but sighing and panting and groaning as the brunette eased himself up and down. It was arguably more pleasurable than if Takuya had been a woman, if only because of the strength and power in his thrusts onto his cock, and the clenched tightness surrounding it that was impossible to compare. He felt Takuya's muscles squeeze hard around every inch as he allowed the organ to penetrate deep into him, then released it only just enough to slightly let it pull out of him, only to disappear back into the hot, tight grip. Kouichi sat up and gripped Takuya's firm little butt and lifted him off of his cock, allowed Takuya to balance himself so he wouldn't fall back, and scooted back to where he was sitting upright against the headboard. Takuya grabbed his shoulders again and squirmed as Kouichi spread him and lowered him slowly back down, gasping and groaning in delighted mewls that made Kouichi burn inside. Takuya rebelliously tried to drop onto his cock to force it back inside NOW instead of letting it slowly inch its way inside, and Kouichi let him, reveling in the clenched heat. Kouichi replaced his arms around his back and whispered an awkward, "Don't stop," and Takuya happily complied as he started riding Kouichi harder with an ecstatic grin behind his pants and cries. This position was much better; he had better leverage and gravity on his side now. He leaned back and grasped Kouichi's shoulders hard to take advantage of this better leverage, and grasped his own bouncing cock as he focused on his own pleasure, which basically involved stuffing himself as full as he could manage with the organ he was allowed to take without end. He wanted to be filled, and he got that wish, for before now only on occasion and only then with a toy was he ever fucked so deep. Every time he rose he wanted it deeper, to have more of that untouched territory violated by Kouichi, and it almost seemed like he repeatedly was granted that wish as well as he allowed gravity to do most of the work for him. He slammed hard and continuously onto Kouichi, tension building and anticipation whirling when he realized he hadn't even managed to hit his prostate yet.
More adjusting, struggling to find that sweet spot. Explosive breaths, vague rubbing of bodies, and a bead of sweat dripping off the tip of Kouichi's nose. Takuya's innocent intent to lick the drop off, only to have it turn into a breath-stealing and hungry kiss. He'd starved for this kind of kiss and was even hungrier for it now that Kouichi was willing to give it, and would've kissed him longer had he not finally managed to rub right against that one amazing spot. Pleasure jolted through his entire body and he moaned louder than ever before, ceasing his thrusts to just rub and feel that sweet pleasure spot make him shudder as Kouichi watched him shaking with interest. Kouji had always hit it dead on and immediately brought him to this state in a few moments; he'd never had the tension build up like it had until it was finally reached. But then, Kouji would never have let him be this much in control. On top, sure, but control... A hard slam down and Kouichi's surprised groan as his pace increased again; thinking of Kouji would ruin this. He needed it too bad to stop it now.
Even as he intensified his pounding onto Kouichi's throbbing cock, he realized all this time he'd been grasping hard at his own, jerking himself off in time to the thrusts to double up on the pleasure without noticing what he was doing. He was feeling the effects now. His fingers were warm and sticky, and his mind was fogged over completely from the mad desire to come in addition to his intoxication. He couldn't keep going like this; he had to come now. Kouichi was picking him up and slowly screwing him from below, unwittingly and with mind numbing slowness rubbing against his prostate, slowly prodding and prodding and prodding at the brunette, balanced so ready to topple over the edge, prodding and prodding at him until he finally did fall, clutching Kouichi hard and accidentally screaming in his ear as he came. He convulsed violently when he did cum, and he bit Kouichi's sweaty neck as the orgasm that had been building up in him for a month racked his body so hard his vision blanked for a second. Kouichi's hand picked up where his had left off, gripping his hypersensitive cock and giving it a few delicate strokes that probably forced out a few extra spurts of the thick white fluid than his body had expected or prepared itself for. One moment everything throbbed with pleasure and overwhelming relief, and the next his mind just blanked. Takuya limply leaned on Kouichi's shoulder and hugged him loosely, trying to catch his breath and shuddering at every movement; every nerve in his body was on overdrive, and it wasn't helping that through all this, Kouichi was still steadily thrusting into him. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Kouichi curiously lick a bit of his cum off of the tip of one pale finger, and then he licked the whole finger to catch it all before it dripped off. Takuya smiled weakly into his neck, wondering when Kouichi would pick up the pace again and realize that for some reason, he couldn't cum.

He had already noticed this, actually. Long ago Kouichi felt like he was seriously only seconds away from cumming, only to be held back for some reason. He didn't want to be held back, so this was irritating him fully when he realized Takuya was done in and he was still aching for more because he hadn't finished yet. Gratefully, only a few minutes after his initial orgasm, Takuya was rubbing himself against the throbbing hard-on still pulsing inside of him. Moments later, Takuya resumed the pace he'd started before, pounding himself raw with the hard shaft Kouichi desperately wanted relief from. They hugged each other tightly and crushed their bodies together as Kouichi took up the main movement, forgetting whose bed this was and whose boyfriend this was and whose apartment this was. Nothing mattered at all except that Kouichi really needed to come, and by the sounds he was making, Takuya needed to as well. Over and over again he felt himself almost, just almost about to fall into sweet oblivion, only to be pulled back suddenly. He imagined himself at the edge of a cliff that he desperately wanted to fall off of, but was being held back by something as he tried to jump off the edge again and again, and each time he was held back, he tried to jump off harder.
Takuya was reaching behind himself, feeling the outside of his entrance as it was violated fast and hard, and he choked on air as he struggled to breathe with cut-off moans and gasps. Panting explosively Kouichi suddenly realized he was moving very fast for no lubrication - perhaps he was hurting him? No sooner had he thought that when Takuya suddenly shook and he came again, releasing a built-up moan and a gush of juices onto his stomach. Kouichi groaned loudly as his throbbing cock was clenched by the tight muscle again, and he moved slowly, just trying to poke himself gently off the edge, almost... almost...
He gasped as Takuya slammed onto him again, and watched him spasm at the hard length settling itself deep into him again. He was sweating and shaking as though he could barely hold himself up, but he gripped Kouichi's shoulders hard and continued riding him, clearly not ready to stop. Kouichi was straining not to cry in frustration. Why couldn't he cum?! Takuya was obviously happy to have a non-stop erection he could pound himself silly on as long as he wanted, but Kouichi was dying with the need to cum so bad he almost was ready to throw Takuya off of him and start jerking himself off normally as long as it gave him relief. But he couldn't bear to loosen himself from that hot, tight grip, and so he just grasped him close and prayed that he would cum soon. Takuya didn't seem to notice or care about the pain his lover was in, and he continued moving his body steadily. He leaned back again, holding himself up with trembling arms and slowly shoving him deep inside, not stopping until every centimeter that was possible to take was inside him. He wrapped his fingers around his only just stiffened shaft again, quivering and moving just to feel the fullness and the hardness rubbing into his prostate, and then he choked a pathetic moan as he came again. He made weak little gasping moans and almost fell back from exhaustion, and would have if Kouichi had not grabbed him and pulled him back into his chest. Kouichi was still violently gasping for air and willing himself to cum while Takuya was limp in his arms, apparently having sated himself. Kouichi nearly whimpered in protest and longing for an orgasm he'd been denied for so long.
"Takuya..." the brunette lazily raised an eye at him.
"I need to cum; I need to cum so bad. Please, do something-"
"Cock ring," Takuya muttered, and he nuzzled his neck.

Kouichi didn't need to be told twice. He picked the brunette completely off of him, much to his sudden surprise, and balanced him with one arm as he ripped off the black rubber band-like ring that apparently forbade him from cumming and kept him constantly hard. He suddenly felt an uncontrollable pressure overwhelm him and he would've come that moment had Takuya not dropped his body back on top of him, not falling back onto his cock but bending it uncomfortably as he sat on it. Kouichi choked back a squeak of pain in addition to his growl of anger at having been denied again.
"Kouichi," he purred, licking and kissing his neck innocently, unawares that he'd just interrupted another orgasm. He was probably ready to resume riding him again.
'Like hell.' Kouichi growled and picked the brunet up again, getting to his knees and then turning around to deposit Takuya on the bed, and crawled on top of him. He received no resistance or protest at removing Takuya from his fragile position of control; just zombie eyes noting that this was something new. Kouichi himself wasn't sure what he was doing, but he just knew he wanted to do it. A shiver slid down his spine as the cool air met his pulsing cock that had before been completely immersed in heat, and he longed to be back inside that welcome heat. He spread Takuya's legs apart to open that tight ring of muscle to him, paying attention to nothing else but that, and he thankfully buried himself in it as far as he could go. Takuya winced and needed a moment to readjust to the new position, then melted into the bed, whispering "Yes" over and over again as Kouichi slowly screwed him to get used to the new angle himself. Kouichi realized that he'd probably played right into Takuya's hands; he had wanted from the start for someone to fuck him senseless. A tight squeeze on his cock was nearly enough to make him cum in itself without the hot look Takuya gave him coupled with it; he was trying to get him to move harder. Kouichi steadied himself so that he could move while still being able to stare down at Takuya. The same unfocused eyes that had hauntedly stared back at him in the living room hours ago stared at him now; deeply grieving eyes that were drunk on sadness and alcohol. There was no soul in them. Kouichi suddenly twitched in regret for being unable to control himself with the brunette in this state... but, he was making Takuya happy, or he would be, as Takuya reminded him with another hard squeeze and an impatient whine, once he picked up the pace. He'd made it clear this was what he wanted, and if Kouichi could provide it, then right now he would get what he wanted. He leaned into the brunet and prepared to increase his pace when Takuya suddenly meekly called: "Koujichi..."
Kouichi paused. Koujichi... his cock throbbed painfully. It was close enough. Kouichi let himself go and could barely control it as he pounded into the brunet as hard as he could, moaning deep in his throat and letting Takuya's sensual sounds wash over him like a warm, soothing lullaby that was smoothing all the kinks out of this moment and making it perfect. As bad as he wanted to come, he held off and forced himself to hold to his erection until he made Takuya come again, or at least until he'd given him the thorough pounding he'd been begging for.

Takuya was ecstatic at the hammering he was getting for the first time in a month; even he hadn't realized how painfully desperate he was for someone to fuck him. He hadn't even noticed his momentary mistake in misnaming his lover, and now he whispered a non-stop mantra of "Kouichi, Kouichi, Kouichi" instead of "Kouji" or even "Master". Kouichi adored the tender way his name was being released from the brunette's lips, even if he couldn't stop panting long enough to say anything in response or to show his own adoration for those lips. He strained to hold this frantic pace that he was already ready to explode from while Takuya just wanted more of it. His desire to feel Takuya cumming again below him fueled his exhausted body to continue its wild, frantic pounding. Even though he wanted to stop so bad and let himself cum, he needed to keep going-
Takuya squeezed his muscles hard again, narrowing his eyes and turning his name into a command for more. It gave him a second's reprieve to re gather himself; his legs were shaking hard and his body was pouring sweat. He had no idea how much longer he'd be able to keep going until he came, and he wished he'd kept that cock ring on.
"Kouichi," Takuya demanded again quietly, pressing his lips against his. He gently began moving again, willing himself the energy to hold on just a little bit longer. Surely Takuya couldn't last much longer either.
He was wrong. Takuya had only just gotten hard again after his previous orgasm, which should've been understandable considering no man can just repeatedly climax so many times in a row, but to Kouichi it seemed immensely unfair. Takuya still expected plenty more while Kouichi was ready to faint. He wanted to keep going; no, he had to keep going. For Takuya. So he'd have to deal with his own discomfort. He blocked out all concept of his own orgasm in his mind and focused completely on Takuya; his sounds, his uneven breath, his flushed and tender skin, everything about him that was burning Kouichi inside. It was a fire he couldn't extinguish or calm whether in the beating roar of passion or the brief moment he caught his breath. He wanted more than anything to feel Takuya shudder and cum again, and for him to be the one to bring him to it. Takuya wasn't begging for more; he was demanding it. Ordering it. His hard, rocking pace was constant as he ignored all the aches in his body begging him to get it over with, letting himself fall neutrally into the single-minded goal of getting him to climax without thinking at all.
It worked perfectly. Soon he completely forgot his protesting body when he absorbed the brunet hugging him with his legs and whispering sweet but dirty pleas into his ear as he forcefully nailed him harder and harder. While he refused to let himself think, the only images his mind could focus on were Takuya's body spasming in pleasure for him; his anxious and uncontrollable moans that he was pulling out of him, his body soaking in sweat and his cock soaking with pre, his trembling arms pulling him closer and refusing to let go, no matter how hard Kouichi jerked his body to continue his thrusts. All at once, Takuya moaned hard and came harder, and Kouichi shivered as Takuya clutched him tightly and rubbed hard against him to release his burning cum. Takuya nuzzled into him and tickled his neck again, settling into his favourite spot on his shoulder.
Kouichi stared into space for a moment before his single-minded focus crashed from around him and the overwhelming urge to cum spiked its highest so suddenly he slammed into Takuya again, surprising him and jerking him from his headrest back into the bed. He almost couldn't move at all, as though his body were suspicious that it was being tricked now that it was actually allowed to release, and the second it tried it would be pulled back again. His descent from the edge was tediously slow, and he willed himself to cum with all his mind could muster when his restraint just crashed. A wicked scream tore itself from his throat as he finally came, and a torrent of moans followed thereafter. At first his entire body just convulsed violently at the first explosion of relief that even made Takuya yelp beneath him as it ripped through his mind and his body, and then his mind just died on him as he continued to mindlessly and powerfully release his seed continuously into Takuya. One powerful squirt after another; he felt like he'd never stop cumming and that he'd never reach the bottom of whatever endless well his body was tapped to; he would just keep cumming into eternity. He was gulping for a solid breath when he opened his eyes and realized that he had in fact stopped cumming- but when he had stopped or how long his mind had been shut off afterwards, he had no idea.

Takuya was twirling a lock of Kouichi's raven hair around his finger with his eyes closed, looking very content. It was suddenly so quiet here without the pounding in his ears or the pleading moans in the background that he could hear the slightest breath Takuya took, and by the deep and even breaths he heard, he judged that Takuya was ready for a good sleep. Kouichi let himself fall into the brunet and sighed. He felt a little jipped. Sure, he was floating along on a fluffy cloud now, but he still wasn't completely satisfied enough to want to sleep. He'd only come once, thanks to Takuya taking advantage of his lack of knowledge, but the brunet had come...four times? No, five, counting the mishap in the kitchen. Completely unfair to Kouichi. And now that he had no restraints on when he could come, he wanted to do it again. If tonight was his only chance, (meaning, if he was going to hold to his promise never to let the brunet drink again, therefore he would never get drunk enough to submit to him again) why not go for it a few times? But this time, he wanted to take it easy and slow - probably because he didn't think he'd be able to last another pounding session.
He lifted himself off of Takuya and removed his shaft from its tight imprisonment. A thin strand of cum stubbornly clung to the tip of his head as he fell to the side of the brunet, who in turn rolled toward Kouichi to snuggle into his chest. Before he got comfortable, Kouichi pushed him and rolled him over to face away from him and to present easy access to him. Takuya hummed pleasantly as Kouichi slid an arm under his and pressed against his back.
"Are you going to fuck me again, koibito?" Takuya purred. Kouichi fluttered a bit inside.
"Don't you know any better synonyms for 'sex'?" he asked off-handedly.
"Mhmm," replied the brunette thickly, probably trying to remember what 'synonym' meant while at the same time not caring, "No."
"How about 'making-love'?"
"Uh huh. You're corny when you're horny, koibito," Takuya teased, and Kouichi reached to tweak his nipple in response. He smoothly entered him again from behind and gently hugged him closer. Kouichi was too lazy to adopt anything more than a slow grind, which he found just perfect. For a few sweet minutes he slowly screwed the brunette, however, Takuya quickly grew bored of the slow pace and slipped into his squeeze-and-plead routine. Kouichi took no notice of the gentle and even the hard squeezes as he ignored Takuya's demands to make it harder, and if anything, he slowed down. A gentle thrust in, hold for a few seconds, and a prolonged pull out. Takuya couldn't stand this horrifically slow movement.
"Kouichi," Takuya demanded louder, and ground himself against the raven-haired, who responded with another tweak to his nipple. "Kouichi, harder."
"Mhmm, no," replied Kouichi; he was teasing the brunet, but he was wondering if he had even caught the mock, as drunk as he was. Takuya apparently wasn't used to being denied a hard fuck and he thrust himself against Kouichi, figuring he'd eventually get the hint. Two orgasms later, it was clear he wasn't going to take the hint, which turned out to be fine for him; as long as the ending result was always the same.

Kouichi had just woken up, but he was so tired he couldn't open his eyes. He just dug his face back into the pillow and tried to fall back asleep, but he found it impossible. Something was amiss and it kept him from nodding off. He finally sat up and rubbed his burning and itchy eyes, then squinted at the digital clock. 5:13. God forbid that he ever get a normal night's sleep. He shuddered from the cold and laid back down into the bed, comfortably hiding his naked body with the thick covers when he abruptly realized that Takuya wasn't in bed with him anymore. Suddenly terrified of all the reasons his wicked imagination could come up with for his disappearance, he jerked up, and this time he heard someone speak softly to him off in the distance: "Hey Kouichi."
Kouichi looked around and squinted in the darkness to find him sitting backwards in a chair, probably one dragged in from the kitchen, near the window. The dusty white drapes occasionally flew up and danced with the wind, which explained why Kouichi was cooler if the window was open. Takuya had dawned a simple white bathrobe, tightly tied at his waist, and was leaning over the back of the chair.
"Hey," he offered back awkwardly as he hid more of his nakedness with the blanket. The plan had been to wake up before Takuya, get dressed, and sneak out of the bedroom because then Takuya would forget everything they'd done that night. And since Kouichi would be sleeping innocently on the couch, he wouldn't have any reason to assume they'd done anything. Complication: Takuya had, for some reason, woken up at 5 o'clock, and had discovered he was lying naked with his boyfriend's brother. But maybe he was still drunk-
Takuya grinned back at him. "Sleep good?"
His voice was different. It was deep and mellifluous; it was the kind of voice that could've made any girl swoon if he were interested charming them with it. He definitely was no longer drunk.
"Uh, I..." Kouichi began to stutter, trying to think of a good response, but couldn't think of any way to explain himself. "Yeah, I guess so."
Takuya was still smiling at him, and then he turned away and stared down at the city below. He said nothing else or did anything to indicate he was going to talk again, so Kouichi leaned over the bed to grab his jeans. He spent a few moments groping in the darkness for his boxers, but couldn't find them. He glanced over his shoulder to see that Takuya was still occupied with the window, and he pulled his jeans on. He couldn't find his shirt either, damn it all, and even as he was groping around for it he heard Takuya ask quietly, "Are you gonna leave?"
Kouichi rubbed at the goose bumps on his arm. "Of course not, Takuya. I just think it would be awkward for me to stand around naked. Unless, you know, you want me to," he joked, and then felt like hitting himself a split second afterwards.
"Oh." Takuya didn't bother to look at him.
"Er, Takuya-"
"Why are you here?" Takuya asked, tilting his head towards him. It wasn't a harsh or cold question, but really just sounded curious. Kouichi relaxed. Maybe Takuya didn't really remember anything about last night. Sure, it was awkward that he'd been naked and sleeping in the same bed as him, but who knows...
"I'm staying here for a while, remember?" Takuya blinked, as if saying no, he didn't remember. "Your Kaa-san called me and said you were having a hard time, so I volunteered to come keep you company for a week or so."
"Oh." Kouichi sat on the edge of the bed, only a few feet away from Takuya.
"Do you remember... anything?" Takuya looked at him inquisitively again. "You know, from last night?"
"Of course I do," Takuya said very simply, and Kouichi felt like he'd just been doused with something very cold.
"Oh," said Kouichi this time, and they were silent.
"...How much?"
"Hmm?"
"How much do you remember?"
Takuya thought for a moment. "I'm not entirely sure," he confessed. "I remember being carried back to the room and then we were in bed together. I was crying, and you were very close and very warm." He puzzled to himself for a moment. "Then I just remember getting really, y'know, turned on and I felt your body really close, like you were hugging me." Kouichi hid a snort as clearing his throat. "Then..." he shook his head. "I can't remember everything; it's too fuzzy. It's clearest after we both, you know, were naked."
Naturally, it would be exactly the part Kouichi wanted him to forget. That at this point HE wanted to forget.

"Hey Kouichi?" The raven-haired tensed up as Takuya turned to look at him again. "Er, thanks."
Kouichi raised a brow. "Thanks?"
"For just trying to help me out. I just appreciate that you wanted to try and make me feel better and that you'd offer yourself to provide comfort sex and all-" Kouichi gave a forced smile with lots of twitching and anger veins. Well, now he wanted to punch Takuya. Offer himself for comfort sex... yeah, he wasn't forced or pressured or seduced at all. "But I don't think it was necessary to sleep with me. I mean, especially since Kouji... he's only been dead a month, you know?" Kouichi saw him wipe his eyes.
"I'm sorry," he said with humility, even though it wasn't entirely his fault. Not drunk, Takuya seemed really modest and shy about his sex-life.
"No, it's alright. I mean, at least I feel better." And he smiled that gorgeous smile again, even if tears were sliding down his cheeks.
"Oh, don't mention it," he said awkwardly, not sure what else TO say. Well, as long as he wasn't angry or suicidal.
"Although I don't appreciate you throwing out my last can of beer," Takuya muttered quietly as he rubbed his eyes. Kouichi wondered how Takuya could've gotten up and started moving around without him noticing at all. And to think; he figured sleeping with him would reduce the risk of Takuya getting up and trying to kill himself without his notice. Takuya yawned. "I feel so tired for some reason."
'I'd imagine after last night,' Kouichi thought, but said: "Might be the sleeping pill. I gave you one when I first got here."
Takuya looked at him oddly. "Where did you find sleeping pills?"
"In one of the cabinets in the kitchen; I was looking for aspirin because you said you had a headache." Takuya still looked confused, so Kouichi continued describing them. "It didn't look like it was prescription. Kouji once told me he had trouble sleeping at night sometimes, so I figured they were his. I thought it might help you sleep. At the time it didn't do much good, " he muttered darkly, "but I suppose in the end it might've knocked you out."
Takuya stared at him, first looking dejected by the mention of Kouji's name, and then a smile broke out on his face. It got bigger and bigger until he started giggling and he turned away from Kouichi again, breaking into full-out laughter. Kouichi was completely puzzled.
"And why are you laughing?"
Takuya's shoulders shook and he bit his hand as he tried to get himself to stop laughing, then he turned back towards Kouichi. "Because you're kind, but stupid, Kouichi."
"...How so?"
"You gave me Viagra, you idiot," he jested playfully, then he turned away and started chuckling again while Kouichi froze for a moment, then violently smacked his four head and then fell back onto the bed with a groan, suddenly feeling amazingly stupid. Viagra! From what he'd heard and from what he experienced, neither of the two needed any damn Viagra.
"It was in a sleeping pill bottle," he murmured in his defense. "Who'd put THAT in a sleeping pill bottle?"
Takuya suddenly stopped laughing. Kouichi peeked up at him. "Kouji. Y'see, we keep it really cool in here because," and Takuya paused, as if trying to come up with an answer. "He was uncomfortable with heat," he finally decided. Kouichi snorted. Apparently this was something he forgot he'd already shared with Kouichi, except then he told it to a different tune. "But when it was cold, sometimes he'd have trouble getting hard, so he just kept a little around." He shrugged, as though this was a simple and obvious answer.
"And it was in a sleeping pill bottle because..."
"In case we had company go looking for aspirin or something. Kouji was paranoid; he didn't want people finding Viagra lying around just because they wanted some aspirin or something." Takuya got up from his chair and migrated to the bed, sitting down next to Kouichi. "Kind of like you," he said, sticking his tongue out at him. Kouichi grinned and reached to pull him down to kiss him, but Takuya shied away, looking hurt.

"Takuya?"
He was quiet for a moment and he stared at the ground. "You're going to be here a week?"
Kouichi sat up with him. "Well, yeah. I promised your Kaa-san I'd look after you. She was really worried about you."
"She doesn't need to be making my life anyone else's business," Takuya said coldly. "I suppose she told you I've been telling her I was going to kill myself?" Kouichi was taken back.
"Well, yeah. But that you don't remember because, because..."
"I'm too much of a drunk to remember threatening to kill myself?" Takuya asked monotonely. "If I was too drunk to remember anything, how could I remember my home phone number?"
It wasn't a very good point, but it made Kouichi pause, then shrug. "No offense Takuya, but you were pretty drunk last night. Besides, as you said a moment ago, you don't remember the finer points."
"Egotistical, aren't you?"
Kouichi was confused. "Wha...?"
"'The finer points' being the sex with you? Or how you somehow got me into bed with you despite the fact Kouji's only been dead a month, and right now the thought of having sex with anyone else makes me sick? Or how you supposedly 'accidentally' slipped me Viagra while I was drunk to get me horny enough to be compliant when you got me into bed? Those are the finer points I can't remember?"
Kouichi was speechless. "N-no! That's not what I meant! None of that! I swear, it was an accident-"
"Viagra's a pretty obvious pill, Kouichi. Designed that way. Doesn't look like many other medications except knock-offs of itself. It certainly doesn't look like an aspirin OR a sleeping pill."
"I-it was dark!" Kouichi stuttered, trying to figure out how to explain how last night had happened while Takuya was drunk. "And hey, I've never seen Viagra before! I just came in, and you were drunk and I was in the kitchen, but then I went back to you, then we were talking about Kouji, but you said the lights were too bright and I turned them out and-" the whole chain seemed hopeless to describe. Each step to the point they got into bed would take forever to thoroughly describe, and in the end Takuya probably wouldn't believe him.
"You just said you tried to sneak me a sleeping pill, thus proving to me that you're capable of slipping me something," Takuya clarified. Kouichi suddenly hated that Takuya had lived with Kouji. In fact, he loathed it. "Why not Viagra instead of a sleeping pill, but you tried to tone it down to make it seem better? Thoughtful Kouichi tried to give me what he thought were sleeping pills so that I could get some rest when in fact he knew it was Viagra. What you don't know is that you're sick both ways. Slip me sleeping pills and knock me out so you can get me in bed with you without a fight, only you slipped me Viagra and I was awake and willing instead. Probably the best mistake of your life." Takuya scoffed. "And I was wondering how I let myself be dragged into bed; I didn't think I was that easy of a drunk."
"YOU dragged ME into bed!" Kouichi exclaimed loudly, very pissed off. "And I was sleeping - and we hadn't done anything! - and then you woke me up and started trying to seduce me-"
"And why were you even sleeping with me in the first place?" Takuya countered. "Even if I tried to drag you into bed, surely I wasn't strong enough to FORCE you to stay there. You could've gotten up anytime you wanted, but you decided to stick around and see what you could get out of it."
"I was afraid you'd kill yourself! Do you think I wanted you to kill yourself of all things? God DAMNIT!" Kouichi slammed back into the bed again, hiding his face with his hands and wanting to scream. How could this have happened? A moment ago Takuya didn't seem bothered at all, and now he was suddenly accusing him of having drugged him and forcing him to have sex!

"Get out." Kouichi looked up at him.
"What?"
"Get out of here. Get out right now. I don't even want to look at you." And he didn't; Takuya was staring determinedly at the floor. "If you don't leave now I'll call the police and have you arrested for breaking and entering, and rape." Kouichi was even more speechless than he was a moment ago.
"You can't do that!" Kouichi wasn't sure about the breaking and entering part, since he hadn't exactly been invited in and he'd just walked in, but he knew there was no cause for a rape charge. "You consented! You wanted it! YOU STARTED IT! If anything I should be the one crying 'rape'!" Takuya looked ready to kill.
"Get out," he seethed, and there was such venom in his voice and hate in his eyes that Kouichi jumped out of bed and flicked on the light. Though he was shaking in anger and fear, he started looking for the rest of his clothes when Takuya screamed, "JUST GET THE FUCK OUT NOW!"
Kouichi's feet somehow carried him to the door, where he mindlessly grabbed his bag and ran all the way to his car, still undressed save for his hastily pulled on jeans. He stopped as he was running to pluck something sticking to his foot; it was the black rubber cock ring. He threw it behind him and kept running. He slammed his car door shut as loud as he could, and shuddered as he leaned over the steering wheel. He felt ready to vomit. What was even worse than the anger and frustration at Takuya's response was this horrible, burning feeling in the pit of his stomach that made him hate himself for having made Takuya angry at him. It was the same burning feeling he'd felt last night when Takuya was cumming from underneath him, only now it was furious that he was leaving Takuya behind. It wanted to be back inside with Takuya; calming him down, snuggling with him, wiping away all his troubles and fear. Just him hugging him close and snuggling tight for comfort. And especially eventually taking care of an early morning erection.

Somehow he saw through the blindness of his rage enough to drive home without having an accident. He arrived without knocking or bothering to be quiet about his entrance, and he simply stormed to his room. His mother interrupted him before he could shut the door, and he yelled at her to leave him alone as she pushed back on it before he could close it in her face.
"Kouichi-chan, what's wrong?" she insisted, pushing against the door he was trying to close. "Why are you so upset?" Kouichi took a deep, shaky breath. He didn't want to yell at his mother; she had done nothing wrong.
"Okaa-san, please don't call me Kouichi-chan. I'm twenty-two years old," he said as civilly as he could. She murmured an agreement and let him close the door. He collapsed on his bed, and immediately ripped off his jeans. He grasped hard at his aching erection and groaned into his pillow, keeping as quiet as he could for his mother's sake. He'd been thinking of Takuya non-stop almost ever since he woke up; he couldn't help himself. As angry as he was at him for putting him through this, the burning fire wouldn't let him rest, and neither would his mind that kept recalling last night and replaying it over and over again. He remembered every explicit detail about Takuya's exquisite body and every movement he made up until the point that he climaxed, where his face was etched into his mind and fueled the fire to an incredibly intense heat. In his mind he was back in bed with the brunet, who gladly let Kouichi take him over and over again as he moaned his name and clenched his tight muscles and arched his back and tweaked his nipples and just did everything that drove Kouichi crazy. Hours of passion reeled in his mind until he abruptly came again, and he moaned into his pillow as he released all over his sheets and in his own hand. He gasped and moaned in his pillow as loudly as he thought he could get away with, and then he started to cry. He bawled and hid his face in the pillow, and he rolled over to avoid lying in his own semen. He wanted to be back with Takuya so bad. He wanted the brunet to be hugging tight to him like there was nothing else in the world and to be begging him with his high-pitched plea to fuck him again. Once during the night Takuya had even requested for him to 'make love' to him instead of to 'fuck him', and then Kouichi almost couldn't control himself to deliver his wish. He whimpered into his pillow. He wanted Takuya so bad; so bad.