Things You Will Never Hear on "Digimon"... Version

[UnknownH]

well since wisemon qoutes his fics I'll give you all one of my only fics

After reading A Girl Called Goo's Outtakes from "A Very Digi Christmas" (http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=246101) I decide to write my own. These are different than those of the previously mentioned fic. Read my disclamer in my authors profile for the disclamer. (But, really would a guy like me own digimon or any songs mentioned? Ha! I wish.)

(all are from the sceen where he is in studio)
Take 1
Matt: ARE YOU READY TO ROCK!
(no answer)
Matt: I said ARE YOU READY TO ROCK!
(no answer)
Matt: Aw forget it. (walks off stage in anger)
Mimi: Alright, now I can sing. (starts to sing)
(Joe and Izzy tackle her to the ground while she screams to let her go)
Cut!

Take 2
Matt: *singing* Just turn around. (turns and falls) (fangirls rush to help with Jun at the front, he gets up runs fast)
Cut!

Take 3
Matt: *sings intellegable*
(In Audience)
Tai: What's he saying?
Izzy: Why does it matter? The girls like it.
(the whole chrowd of girls are screeming loudly)
Director: Lucky I have earpugs for this.
Cut!

Take 4
Matt: ( without guitar) Two trailer park girls go round the outside,
round the outside, round the outside.
Guys in audience: Hey wait, that aint rock.
*the girls in the audience are listening anyway*
Cut!

Take 5
(Tai is on stage with Matt, who has an acostic guitar)

Matt: And you can bring me to my knees...Again
All this time when I could beg you please....In vain
All the times when I felt insecure....For you
And I leave my burdens at the door

Tai: But I'm on the outside
I'm looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
Inside you're ugly
You're ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you

*fangirls melt at this*
Cut!

Take 6
Matt: Born with no soul
Lack of control
Cut from the mold of the anti-social
Plug em in and then turn it on
Process the data, make yourself da bomb
What is your target?
What is your reason?
Do you have emotions?
Is your heart freezing?
Seizin, this opportunity to speak
Ya didn't say nuttin but turn your fuckin cheek
Dead cell!
Dead cell!
*Chrowd starts moshing*
Cut!

Take 7
Matt: We're not ready yet, just look
If I'm right and we really get crushed
Then what's the point?

Director: Finally! That's a wrap people.

ANs 1. Matt rapping was a joke and btw that song was Without Me by Eminem.
2. That other song was Outside by Staind. Matt was Fred Durst and Tai was the lead singer of Staind.
3. The third song is Dead Cell By Papa Roach. I just thought I'd add a mosh take in there. All three songs were found on Letssingit.com (don't forget the two s to the address, don't ask why)
4. The last song was part of Matt's image song, Walk on the edge. I got the song from http://www.animelyrics.com

That's it goodbye.

if I could get into mediaminer.org I'd add the other few fics I did
I was going to write a say what kareoke fic with digimon characters in it but I can't get into to my name

[Gnostic Metatron Prime]

Not bad, but this is starting to get excessive. The contest isn't really supposed to be about lifting passages from your own fanfics. I was hoping for more improvised stuff.

[Rikaryo2000]

lol that was good

[Wisemon]

well since wisemon qoutes his fics I'll give you all one of my only fics

Yep, I've quoted some of my own stories for this, but I've also written the most original scripts for this thread, and if I do say so myself, the best ones.

Not bad, but this is starting to get excessive. The contest isn't really supposed to be about lifting passages from your own fanfics. I was hoping for more improvised stuff.

You want improvisation? You want something original? Look no further than the Original Prankster. Here's a gigantic reference/metaphor.

From "A Clue From The Digi-Past":

Izzy: There's definitely something in there with them.
Mimi: Spill it, Izzy; what's in this maze with us?
Izzy*studies computer*: Bakemon...a bunch of them...coming from the center of the maze.
Mimi: We can't defend ourselves against Bakemon. They can practically kill us by touching us. How do we get out of this maze?
Izzy: There should be some white grapes all along the path of the maze. If you eat them all, you'll beat the maze.
Mimi: That doesn't make any sense, and since when are grapes white?
Izzy: They're the seedless kind. They're actually green, but they're called white grapes. It's a Mediterranean thing.
Mimi: Oh.
Izzy: If you get sick of the grapes, there are some cherries in the corners. After you eat those, you'll be able to get rid of the Bakemon, but only temporarily.

Three minutes later...

Mimi: Izzy, I avoided the Bakemon, and I ate all of the grapes. It wasn't easy.
Izzy: Prodigious, nice work.
Mimi: Yeah, the only problem is that all of the grapes reappeared, and now the Bakemon are moving faster.
Izzy: That sucks.
Mimi: It totally sucks. I can eat all of the grapes again, but I think they'll just reappear again. So, what's the point?
Izzy: You're trying to get the high score.
Mimi: Oh, I get it now. Izzy, I don't think I'm going to make it out of here, so can you do me a favor?
Izzy: Sure.
Mimi: Have Palmon jam your computer up your ass.

[Rikaryo2000]

ahahahhahahahhahaha ohhhhhhhhhhhh lol thats good!!!!!!!!!

[UnknownH]

I only did that cause I can't think of any
and wisemon HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
pac-mon! *wacka wacka*

here I thought up one

Davis:angemon and angewomon? is there a angebabymon?
Patamon: maybe we're trying tonight.
TK: wha?
Patamon: oops.

[Lord Archive]

Ms. Takaishi sat uneasily. "Takeru, it's time I told you the true reason why I got a divorce. You see, when I was a little older than you are now, I'd make some extra money by having guys pay me for sex. Ishida was one of my... more loyal customers. When I learned I was pregnant with Yamato, a DNA test proved him to be the father. With a bit of... coercion and my mother's set of kitchen knives, I married him."

Takeru stared at his mother with wide unseeing eyes. He knew many girls resorted to prostitution to get some extra money, but he never thought his own mother had done that too.

Ms. Takashi shifted nervously. "The marriage wasn't exactly going well, and money was more than a bit of an issue at times. To make ends meet... I returned to doing what I knew would make money the fastest. Ishida turned a blind eye to it until you were born.... A DNA test on you proved he wasn't your father."

"WHAT?!" Takeru cried out in shock.

"You are not Ishida's son and Yamato is your half-brother," Ms. Takaishi spelled it out to help her son come to terms with this faster.

Takeru was beyond shocked to hear all of this. There was no way things could possibly get more messed up. "Who... who is my father?"

Ms. Takaishi coughed. "Well, remember the physical you took a few weeks ago?"

Takeru nodded, confused.

"Um, I kind of met one of the guys I had been with at the time you were conceived. And the test proved he was your father." Ms. Takaishi turned away and closed her eyes. "You can't let anyone know he's your true father, but you have to know this. Your father is... Mr. Yagami, Hikari's father."

"You're joking, right?! RIGHT?!" Takeru stood up and made his mother look him in the face. "He can't be my father!"

"He is," Ms. Takaishi told her son sadly.

Takeru ran out of his house. There was no way this could possibly get worse. This whole situation was fucked up to hell. He wanted life to return to normal of killing dark digimon and saving the world.

Takeru made his way to the park and sat in a swing looking at the normal children playing, wishing he could be just like them.

"Takeru?" Hikari called out to him as she approached. "Takeru, there's something I have to tell you."

Takeru looked at her lost and confused gaze. Had their father told her the truth as well? That they were half-siblings?

Hikari shifted. "I guess the only way to say this is to just say it. Takeru... I'm pregnant."

Takeru promptly fell off the swing. He then jumped to his feet and screamed to the sky. "FUCK YOU, GOD! I WON'T SAY 'THIS CAN'T GET ANY WORSE AGAIN' SO YOU CAN STOP SHOWING ME THAT, YES, IT FUCKING CAN GET WORSE, YOU ASSHOLE!"

[UnknownH]

that's pretty funny and possibly sadly ironic

[Wisemon]

that's pretty funny and possibly sadly ironic

Right, funny, but not funny "aha-ha-ha", nor funny "whoa-oh-oh", more like funny "uh-huh-huh".

Davis:angemon and angewomon? is there a angebabymon?
Patamon: maybe we're trying tonight.
TK: wha?
Patamon: oops.

I have the same episode in mind. Warning: Drinking while reading this may cause your beverage to come out of your nose.

From "Guardian Angel":

Kari*crying*: We all took a picture together.
Andromon*remembering*: A picture...faces...long ago...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
Kari: Andromon? Andromon? What happened to Andromon?
Davis*holds up some loose cables*: While you had him distracted, I pulled these out of the back of his head. I saved you, and I didn't even need Veemon. So how about a thank you kiss?
Kari: You fucking moron, that was our friend!
Davis: So I can't even get a kiss? You let that cyborg put his giant thumb on your chest.
T.K.: You just don't get it. Seriously, can you do anything right, or do you just fuck up everything that you touch?
Davis*grabs T.K.'s shoulder firmly and glares menacingly into his eyes*: I'm about to do both.
T.K.*gulps, feels something warm, and looks down at his crotch*: Before you beat me up, will you let me change my pants? I just had an accident.
Davis: Absolutely, I want your blood, not your urine.
T.K.*holds up D-3 next to computer*: Digi-Port, open! So long, sucker! *He exits into the real world.*
Patamon: I don't think he's coming back.
Davis: You'd better hope that he does, because if he's not back in ten minutes, you're getting his beat-down.
Patamon: Yeah right, all I have to do is Digivolve and...oh shit.

Ten minutes later...

Davis: T.K. still hasn't shown up, but Patamon, I'm feeling generous. T.K. just abandoned you, at least for today, so how'd you like to be my alternate partner?
Patamon: Why do you want me as your partner?
Davis: Kari, you're fucking T.K., right?
Kari: Eventually, yes, I plan on doing that.
Davis: And there's no chance of you choosing me?
Kari: No chance in hell.
Davis: You see, Patamon, if I can't take T.K.'s girl, I'll take his partner.
Patamon: Okay, I'll be your partner.
Veemon*shakes Patamon's ear*: Welcome to the winning team.
Kari: The winning team of losers.

[UnknownH]

wierd and another line for mine would have been;
Patamon: You can't prove it! I didn't touch her!